


let us howl our loss

by Tobi_Black



Series: Let Us 'verse [25]
Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rise of Empire Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Clone Rebellion, Gen, Post-Order 66
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-09-28 00:39:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17172551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tobi_Black/pseuds/Tobi_Black
Summary: After Order 66 went out, the worlds just kept turning. The War changed names, changed objectives, the enemy changed, but it never stopped. A Republic fell and an Empire rose, but that meant little for the vode.What mattered to the Wolffepack was that their [Traitor] was dead. By their hands.But their General wasn’t gone.





	1. Chapter 1

**19 BBY**

Their [Traitor] was dead.

They’d shot their [Traitor] out of the sky, knowing that re-entry would kill most – and _he_ most assuredly with his methane-based breathing.

Seeing his ship crash, they’d never checked for a body – never seen with their own eyes the body of their [Traitor] – because he _couldn’t_ have survived.

Sinker had watched as Commander Wolffe had turned stiffly away, lowering his weapon, as smoke rose up from the crash and eyes were wet from tears.

Tears from smoke.

It didn’t matter that the smoke was a decent distance away and that they were upwind.

The tears were because of the _smoke_.

The smoke from the crash that had killed their [Traitor].

 _They_ had _killed_ their [Traitor].

Beside him, Boost had burst into heaving sobs.

Something heavy sat on his chest, and he hardly recognized how he turned away from the smoke and after Wolffe’s staggering steps.

He followed his Commander away from this place of death.

~

It came in the frantic moments, when they rushed forward in the ill-fitting, ill-suited new white armor to rescue _vod_ and newly-named stormtroopers alike.

A turn of the head to track the movement of the two – now one – leading the charge past enemy lines to extract allies. A name choking their throat because _had anyone checked if_ his _filters were working with all this smoke and ash in the air?_ That second where Wolffe glanced to the side after telling them their plan, looking for someone to confirm against.

It came in the slow moments, in the long travels from planet to planet, to starship to starship.

When walking past the ship’s officer’s quarters, anticipating their _names_ – not numbers – being called. After the fight was done and things were almost peaceful, spotting a plant or a rock or a crystal and thinking _he’d like that_. Going into the mess, eyes traveling to the center of the Wolffepack and looking for someone.

They were _all_ expecting to see their [Traitor] at their sides.

But they’d [executed] their [Traitor].

~

A ‘trooper, not a _vod_ , told ghost stories to the newest recruits about [Traitors].

Of the fantastical, _un-natural_ things they’d been capable of.

(Yet, Booster couldn’t help but think of the time his jetpack had failed and their [Traitor] had reached out and caught him from such a distance away, and how his life had been _saved_.)

Of monsters stealing children and creating more monsters without emotion.

(Yet, Sinker couldn’t help but remember of the first he saw Commander Tano and their [Traitor] together, of how _he_  had radiated fondness and pride looking at her, and Tano had clearly sought his approval and gave her affection.)

Of strength and speed unrivaled by machine.

(Yet, Comet thought of how he’d seen their [Traitor] move so _very_ fast across the battlefield, then catch a flyaway, _massive_ hunk of clanker that would have flattened them without being slowed down, and indeed hadn’t been in the slightest by ten or more clankers trying the same.)

Of silver-tongues and mind-tricks that had you saying _yes_ when you meant _no_.

(Yet, Wolffe remembered when Cody’s [Traitor] had been captured by slavers, how their [Traitor] had talked his way through barricades to be the one closest, to get them on planet, and how Cody’s [Traitor] had continued to be _whipped_ so others _weren’t_.)

The newest recruits laughed nervously, asking if it was true they’d all been killed off.

The ‘trooper had laughed and said most had been, but rumors of those that had managed to flee persisted – Cody’s [Traitor] the single-most well-known in the _galaxy_ at this point because of that.

It was a _ghost_ story he said, because people all through the galaxy had _seen_ a [Traitor] after they’d died, in a haze of blue, moving things and playing tricks on the mind.

He told the recruits that this was a _real_ ghost story, and that they should be very afraid of the [Traitor] ghosts.

Not a single _vod_ of the former 104th managed to speak up, each remembering a thousand and one kindnesses by their [Traitor] and how he had treated each one of them as an individual and un-expendable.

Their [Traitor] had _betrayed_ the Republic, betrayed _them_. They’d [executed] him for it.

(But it didn’t explain why there was this heavy weight on their chests, why their throats seized up and their vision blurred.

It didn’t explain why when they repeated off the names of their dead, people they’d loved and still missed, hoping they were heard by those who had marched away to far-off shores so they knew they were never forgotten, their [Traitor] was among those names.)


	2. Chapter 2

Six months passed since they had [executed] their [Traitor] before they knew it.

It had startled many of the 104th – indeed most of the _vode_ if everyone was honest – to find it had been _six_ _months_ for those planet-bound – and longer for those of them like the 104th who were always on the move, always going to the next fight – since so many [Traitors] were [executed].

They’d been forced to learn that the pain of grief – that heavy weight on his chest that made his heart hurt at any reminder of those they’d lost – faded some with time during the Wars.

Boost had watched as his _vode_ ran themselves into the ground, denying that grief for something they couldn’t name, as the new recruits, the newly-dubbed _stormtroopers_ , joked and laughed. While they _still_ found themselves looking for their [Traitor] at what felt like the most inopportune moments, the ‘troopers climbed ranks within weeks of being assigned to an outpost, to a Star Destroyer.

Suddenly the _vode_ weren’t the majority anymore, then not even half as the Empire recruited people.

Boost remembered when Wolffe lost command of the entire 104th, then the Battalion disbanded and they were separated.

Life went on despite that, and they were still sent out – but no longer for _vode_ , and instead to retrieve military objectives.

Then during such a mission, they came across a freshly-dead [Traitor].

Each of them very distinctly remembered the long-necks on Kamino training any sort of reaction to a dead _vod_ while still in the middle of combat out of them, yet none of them couldn’t help the visceral _recoil_.

Wolffe’s hands were fisted at his side, and the rest of the Wolffepack couldn’t help but stare at him.

Their Commander was just standing there in front of the [Traitor].

It took a moment for them to realize his hands were shaking around the handle of his blaster – and so were their own. Comet had drawn his even, while Sinker white-knuckled his, and Boost had gone deathly pale.

A whisper was in their ears saying that the [Traitor] was faking, and should be shot again _just to be sure_ , and was surely speaking in Wolffe’s too, but their Commander was fighting to _not_. And they found strength from that, managing to keep their fingers off their triggers because of it.

Wolffe turned sharply on his heel, away from the [Traitor], voice a low snarl that was only barely heard when their Commander went on the prowl past them.

“Not again. Never again.”

Sinker went right on his heels.

The snarl that escaped him at how the [Traitor] didn’t look much older than a _shiny_ drowned out that whisper in his ear.

“Not on our watch.”

~

Wolffe’s resolve didn’t get the chance to be tested when shortly after that mission, his fitness in the field was questioned and a ‘trooper was put in his place to lead Extraction Team 3636.

It was then Boost realized that the fact that he had so far remained with Wolffe, Sinker, and Comet, was unusual. The rest of the 104th worked in duos or trios, more often the latter than the former, unlike most other Battalions which were the opposite, what with their expertise being in extraction.

A fact that became very obvious by the ‘trooper assigned to them, and his derisive comments about how Wolffe led – and about the _vode_ in general.

In part because of a set of rather persistent rumors that they were too much like the [Traitors], and that was why they had been able to [execute] them despite three years of close quarters.

There also seemed to be the sentiment that either they’d been able to be fooled once, so it was best to put people – _real people_ , not clones – in their places to phase them out so it wouldn’t happen again, or that they’d _known_ and betrayed the Empire, and thus shouldn’t be trusted and should still be phased out.

Boost tried to find the silver lining in this, tried to find _anything_ good about the situation they found themselves in, but he couldn’t.

Not when there were whispers that every clone was to be decommissioned in the next year.

Sinker had laughed cruelly when he told him _why_ they were being treated so bad, and said this was _nothing new_. That they had never been of any worth to the shade of a Republic they’d served, and that all their [Traitor] had done was give cause to these rumors springing up now, giving them hope and naming them _irreplaceable individuals_.

Comet had slapped Sinker across the face for that.

They’d all been particularly quiet for the few days after that, because their [Traitor] might have been a traitor in the eyes of the Empire, but he’d been good to them.

 _He’d_ been _good_ to them; not the Republic, not the [Traitors], not the Senate, not the long-necks on Kamino, and certainly not the _Empire_.

Boost wondered why _he’d_ never told them about the [Traitors’] rebellion, and the best he could come up with was that _he’d_ not wanted them to feel obligated to join.

Neither Sinker, nor Comet, said it in so many words after their little fight, but they thought the same as him – they wished they’d joined _him_ in rebellion, for no more reason than because they’d would have rather fought and died at _his_ side, no matter _his_ cause, than serving their current masters.

Then Wolffe came home to them after several months’ absence, and asked them to trust him.

Boost didn’t hesitate.

Sinker didn’t either.

Nor Comet.


	3. Chapter 3

Comet woke up swinging.

Wolffe was at his side, knocking the disorientated strike to the side with an amused chuckle. Comet found himself stilling faster at that then anything else, because Wolffe hadn’t been any sort of amused in close to eight months.

Not since _before_ their _jetii_ had died.

Wolffe looked to the left, where both Sinker and Boost were still knocked out though Sinker’s face was starting to scrunch up so he would be up soon, clearly checking up on them.

“The Fett blood is strong in you, _vod_ , if you woke up swinging. I did, and so did Cody apparently – that straight-laced fool somehow managed to clip Jango after his chip was removed.”

Comet looked at his Commander for a long moment, because he _thought_ Wolffe had said _Jango Fett_ was still alive, which was impossible, General Kenobi had confirmed it on Geonosis-

He groaned, rubbing at his temples because he had a feeling he should have seen this coming, they were talking about _Cody’s jetii_ after all.

Wolffe barked out a short hoarse laugh.

“Yeah, I know, it should have been no surprise, we _are_ talking about General Kenobi. He could talk circles around any of us at any point of time, so that he did is nothing new. Then there is also the fact that he is no stranger to deception after his death was faked. And as par usual, his silver-tongue saved us because Jango found out about the slave-chips in our heads and is helping get them out.”

The laugh died though, and when Comet looked up, Wolffe looked _outraged_ , visibly and undeniably _pissed-off_.

“Those long-necks put slave-chips in our heads before we were even decanted, then sent us off to die. Those of us that didn’t die in war were always going to be enslaved at the beck-and-call of some master we never knew of. We were always intended to kill the Jedi, Comet. That we were allowed so close, were trusted at their backs and with their shinies, I don’t know if it was planned or just a boon, but I intend to make them _regret_ it.”

Wolffe truly looked his namesake, dark eye glinting darkly as his teeth flashed.

He stood in one single smooth motion, head turning to show familiar grey marks had been painted onto his neck and down beneath his blacks.

Comet watched as that visible anger was shed, replaced by a cold look in his eye.

“Explain to them about the chips when they wake up, I need to go before our absences are noted and connected with my return to the ship. You three have two choices: either you stay with me in the Empire, to hinder it from within and help any _jetii_ that survived, or you leave before you reveal that your chip was removed. Jango told Cody that he would take up the Mandalore title as he should have before the war, and that any of his _ade_ were welcome there as he routed the Empire out of his home.”

Sinker woke up swinging with a snarl on his lips right then and Comet had to hastily dodge his _vod_ ’s punch before he was laid out on the floor seeing stars – and he didn’t see that Wolffe left with the faintest up-quirk of his lips.

~

The three of them had been divided on whether they should stay or go, whether to assist Wolffe or join the fight against the Empire on Mandalore.

They had been divided right up until Boost had said in his usual optimistic manner that drove Sinker around the bend more often than not, that _their jetii_ might still be _alive_. They’d never confirmed it, and though Wolffe had returned with a lightsaber clipped to his belt, their Commander had been unable to answer the question of whether there was a body.

None of them could blame Wolffe, because for him, he wouldn’t have just killed their _jetii_ , but would have killed his _buir_. Thinking that, and _knowing_ that, were two very different things, and while both were devastating to acknowledge now that they could think on it properly, the latter would be far worse.

Once the idea was in their heads though, they couldn’t let it go, even Sinker.

They needed to confirm one way or another that their _jetii_ was alive or dead.

However, Wolffe would stay, just like Cody and Ponds were. Those three of their _vod_ intended to see to the downfall of the Empire in penance to their _jetii_.

Comet knew Wolffe wanted an answer to the question just as much he didn’t, not with the idea that he’d killed his _buir_ or that he’d abandoned him to die if he hadn’t succeeded in his attempt to, in his head. He could see the moments where he thought on either of those ideas in the way he would walk around with a dead look in his eye instead of the anger that had settled there, but the anger wouldn’t last forever. It _couldn’t_ hold forever.

The guilt would overwhelm him, one way or the other, just like it had some of their _vode_ already.

Boost had already tackled Sinker once because he’d wanted to eat a blaster out of guilt, and while Wolffe hadn’t shown such an inclination so far, Comet worried he was merely biding his time. He _knew_ that Wolffe wouldn’t until the Empire lay in ruins at his feet, but he also knew that was all that stayed his hand.

Comet had accepted that there was no way they could have done anything to not act out Order 66, not after a _vod_ had dismantled and dissected one of the chips that had been in their heads and thoroughly found every which way their actions had been planned out. That they’d already been fighting the chip’s control as much as they could in willful mis-directs. And each day, they’d been eroding the spirit of the order as much as the letter, to where they _could_ fight it.

The guilt would never go away though.

The three of them had already discussed it, then informed Wolffe of their decision, and they would disappear on their next mission to leave and look for any sign of their _jetii_.


End file.
